This is a corner of my world where the hokey pokey really is what it's all about! So when life hits you all at once ~ just sit back and enjoy the ride!

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

It all started with a test!

Well for the past 3 days all the K teachers at my school(5) have been going to the local daycare to test the upcoming K for next year. We do this as a service to help us during registration to make things go smooth and quick. It has taken us to @ lunchtime before getting back to the school~yes it is nice being with adults and having a break from routine. BUT I like teaching because I like my kids. Well when I walked into the school I saw my kids for @8 minutes after their lunch and they loved and hugged on me as if we haven't seen each other in a month. It is nice to be loved! Well, I took them to their hour block~which is my planning time and they go to PE and another 30 min. activity. I have alot of testing I have to do to end our school year on the 19 students that are in my group(regular and inclusion students), plus report cards, plus teach/review, plus prevent injury and maintain order. I need to be an octopus and do alot of multi tasking to get everything done. OH!I forgot that we only have 16 school days to get this done. I forgot I have meetings I have to go to that we keep me out of my room for 4 1/2 days in those 16 days. Well during my planning I have started making a to do list that is now 2 legal pages long and this is only for school stuff! Oh~please don't feel sorry just start laughing it gets better. Well when my kids finally get back in the class from PE, we go to the potty and get water. We finally finished and I thought I would try to at least teach one Math lesson before the day was over. We get ready to start Math and the fire alarm goes off. Well I just laughed~I am tired so my laughter turned to tears. This whole time I get my class, grab the roll, and exit to the hall. A friend asked me did I want them to close my door. I looked and knew who the last child was and said yes because she was with me. I am still laughing while leaving the building because I didn't know if any kids were out and I was laughing because I was trying to teach. Anyway we get outside. I am checking the roll and the teacher that shut my door walked up to me. She has my cutie Josh. She said you left him in the bathroom I saw him coming out when I shut the door. OK ~18years of teaching I have never lost or left a child. I have had them run away from school but I was running behind them but I never left. Well I am at this point laughing and crying to the point my students can't figure out the deal. My Josh looks up at me and says with very wide eyes,"You left me on the pot!" I looked at him and said that he had asked to go 10 minutes ago I thought you came out. (The bathrooms are located in our room.) I am so .........stressed this time of year but this is not like me. I am a child counter at all times. But it happened ~It was a drill~and He knew to go outside and find me!
Well~If this had been the end of my stressful day I would have been happy! But then my hubby called and left me a voice mail to call him ASAP. I called thinking is was trivial and he said I had just been summoned to court duty~Monday! So for those of you who know me I am FINE!! Hope your day was less stressed than mine!! Hope you have a Smurfy Day!

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Poor Rick

Rick was in trouble. He forgot Valentine's Day. His wife was really angry.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that
goes from 0 to 200 in less than 10 seconds, AND IT BETTER BE THERE!!"
The next morning Rick got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up
she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in
the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out
to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house. She opened it and
found a brand new bathroom scale.

Rick has been missing since Friday. Please pray for him

Sunday, April 27, 2008

All Good Things Must Come to an End!

Well I hate to say it but this is my last day...of spring break. I have done nothing this whole week~I mean nothing! I have enjoyed it so......much. My family and I have just vegetated and enjoyed the fact there was not a schedule to keep and we did our own thing. It was kind of sad that Mr. Honey did not get the chance to be off while school was out~but that is a good thing because that means he is staying busy. Which in turn means we can pay bills. It is so depressing how tired my family and I have been. School has been long with a lot of changes for me. But ho hum~ I just don't want to go back to the rat race for 18 more days. I will survive but I hope that my family will get away this summer for some fun~who knows? Well we only have a few more school days to find out! Hope you have a great week!

Friday, April 25, 2008


Have you ever thought about how much you like yourself? I know there are probably 101 things I would love to change about myself~starting with my waistline. But who am I and what made me ~ me? I had a loving Mom and Dad that were married until my father passed away. My mom is a recovering alcoholic with alot of anal retentive tendencies. I am so.....anal retentive. I am the middle child who wants to fix the world, curses like a sailor~or worse, teaches an inclusion kindergarten class, mother of two, wife of another middle child....but do I like who I am? Well because you are reading this post ~you have no idea how long I have paused before answering that question. LOL! It is true.. I did have to ponder it but....I do like myself. Nope, I am not 110% satisfied there are so many things I would change about me. I would be skinny and in shape and the best Mom, and Wife, and daughter that I could possible be. Not in that order but I do see alot of things I would change~but I look at ho much I have transformed throughout these 40 years. I have to say I turned out ok. I have always been a fighter ~even when I was in the 7th grade when I got detention for beating up 3 boys. Not lady like but they pissed me off! I remember when Mr. Honey and I broke the news to my Mom and Dad that we were going to get married and my Dad went through the roof that in 3-4 years when he didn't want me any more ~ he couldn't bring me back with my 4-5 kids and expect my Daddy to help me. I think what my Dad meant was~he wasn't ready for his first daughter to get married! I laughed my tail off! He called me the next day and told me he was sorry not for what he said but for HOW he said it. I have been married for 13 years and despite wanting to return me because I am a stubborn, hard headed, anal retentive, always want to be right kind of a person~he has kept me. I have grown up more in the last 13 years than I did in the first 27 years of my life. My Dad died less than a month after we got married ~ don't get me wrong that was hard losing my Dad who was my dearest friend~but it was then that I realized how lucky I am for having the life that I have had because it has made me into the person I am. So I have some issues I would like to change but that's ok I think there will always be room for change. I am not perfect at anything~but I am me and that is the only person I can be. So for those folks that have a problem with me~tough that is who I am and who I will always be. Like Flo on the 80's sitcom use to say if you don't like it "will you can kiss my grits!" So if you are a person like I used to be and worry about what people think of you~stop worrying about it! Just be you and remember that God don't make no junk! If you are a person who reads children's books than I recommend a book that John Lithgow wrote called "Marsupial Sue". In the book Marsupial Sue wants to be anything but a kangaroo. But she learns a very important lesson.

"Marisupial Sue.
A lesson or two:
Be happy with who you are.
Don't ever stray too far from you.
Get rid of that frown,
So waltz up and down
Beneath a marsupial star.
If you're a kangaroo through and through.
So do what kangaroos do."

You can't please all of the people all of the time but you do have to be and love you! Well that is my therapy today! No I am not always so....sappy. It is just where I am today!
Have a Great Today!

Thursday, April 24, 2008


Last night after writing that long post, I was relieved that my youngest asked me to read her a bedtime story. She chose the story and it was Sassafras by Audrey Penn. It is a story of a skunk that doesn't want to play with anyone for fear he might make a little stink. Through the story he learns that we are who we're meant to be. The stink is apart of the skunk and the stinger is a part of the bee for a reason. Every creature is special as a way of protecting it. God doesn't make any of us in a haphazard way. There is a reason we are the way we are. The life lessons, trials and tribulations we go through in our life are the things that help us become who we are meant to be. Now we don't always learn the lessons in a timely manner, sometimes we need remediation, sometimes multiple opportunities are necessary to get the lesson learned, and most of the time a friend helps us through. Aren't we lucky that God is in control and understands that sometimes we are slow learners and need lots of patience. To borrow a quote from Sassafras "we are who we are. That's the way it should be. Even smelly-old, stinky-old, funky-old me!" Hope you have a great day just being you!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I am so FINE!

Here I go again~I think a colon cleansing would be much easier and much more fun than a soul cleansing. Church is my subject today! I have so many fun memories growing up in the church. First, crush was with a boy named David at a church youth lockin at a church a town away. Then there was Charlie my much older crush~he was 4 years older and didn't know I even thought he was cute. But as a child we went every Sunday and I loved going.  went to church camp, Epworth, and participated in many different areas. I grow up Methodist and I have a pin that was given for every year I had perfect attendance~I had 18 years of perfect attendace.
Then I went to college and I never found one that made me feel like I belonged. I tried Baptist, Methodist,etc. I didn't care which denomination. I wanted a church that felt like family.  I graduated and moved to a town near my home town and didn't try to find a church. I still read my bible and prayed~in fact I prayed more than I had done earlier in my life. I just quit finding a place to belong.  Well, I moved again a year later to another town close to my home town. I went and visited several churches but I didn't really try to belong~I guess I liked being an outsider looking in and saying this just isn't me.
d To skip ahead several years~I met Mr. Honey who had grown up baptist and didn't have a church he called home either we were a perfect match. Well this Methodist married that Baptist by a Presbaterian in a Methodist church. I have always said that God has a sense of humor~there is more to that story but I won't go into it today. My Hubby and I settled down in the Methodist Church and we now have 2 kids~several years have passed by now. I have seen several preachers come and go and one in particular that I hated to see leave. He was a minister that had gone through many ordeals that made him know what everyday ordinary people have experienced in life. He had even gone to jail when he was younger and dumber. But that is not my story to tell~I just hated to see him leave.
My grandmother has always tried to tell me that the preacher is not the church. But the preacher that is currently at our church thinks he is the church. When my Hubby was injured I called the church to cancel an appointment and explained to them what had happened. But the pastor nor associate pastor or anyone other than my 2 friends that also go to the same church even called to check on my husband. Our former ministered called but not my current. It was almost 3 weeks after my husband's injury right after we had talked with our former pastor that the new pastor called to tell us he didn't know how to get to our house but how was my husband. I know i should let this go but I am struggling with this. We live in a modern world~telephone, email, cell phones, I work at a school less than a mile from my church~He never tried to contact us. It took our former pastor to call him and tell him to make contact. Instead of him just saying I am sorry~he blamed the fact he had lived in this town for 3 months and didn't know his way around. Ok~Susan let this go! Well this same pastor has been here for 2 years and I have quit going to church because I have a problem with him. He has changed evertything about our church he has taken money from programs like the children's daycare,scouts, etc. and puts it into programs he and only he wants. I know this sounds stupid. Jay's mom almost died back in October and again we called the church. Again we called the church and the preacher was going to stay in touch. We never saw him up at the hospital when we were there~he was up there one morning early and went back to pray with her but he didn't check on Jay and talk with him about the fact his mother may or may not pull through. The associate pastor did follow through and talked with us and for that I am glad!
well that leads me to the fact that my family and I are not attending church. With the exception of my 2 close friends no one seems to notice we aren't there. The Sunday School classes that my kids are in haven't bothered to even send a note saying they have been missed. No calls from the preacher or anyone asking is everything ok? Are ya'll having a rough time? Nothing?! Why? If they need something they call me or my hubby~But they can't call me or check on me just because... Now who am I punishing for not going? Me but most of all my children. That makes me mad. I know get over it and get on with it. That is where I am today. I want to be important enough to be missed~I know my hang up with the preacher is all me and I am going to have to grow up and let it go. But is it wrong to want someone to say hey we missed you today. That is what a family is all about being concerned and caring about what is going on.
Sorry this is so long winded~Nadine when you read this and I know at some point you will~Thank you for caring and always noticing when I am absent. I know I got to let it go~it is what it is. I am trying to let it go now with this cleansing! We will see!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Back To the Basics

Well for weeks I have put off typing about life~instead I have focused on funny tales. I guess when life hits me like a Mac Truck backs up and runs over me repeatedly I remove myself by pouring myself into funny tidbits. For a minute or two it gets my mind off of me. I have always done this~believe me you don't just turn 40 and pick up new habits. Otherwise~my hubby would be retrained. All my life when life got complicated I would focus on anything other than me. For the past two years my life has been tumbled around like and ADHD fart in a tornado. My hubby of 13 years was nailed by his boss~literally. It was a 8 penny nail to the eye. Thanks to God~He did not lose his sight or his eye. Mind you he has constant headaches and his vision is declining could have been so much worse. His boss who promised that he would make this right and take care of all medical bills lied~told us one set of lies for the first year. Jay went out on his own and has learned a lot about his former boss that makes my stomach churn. In these two years we have grown closer~none of his bills have paid by his former boss~we have been battling this with lawyers~going out on his own has been wonderful but ~ stressful none the less. For the past few months we have been trying to get this issue behind us and it will in time. Just not in my time. I have so many things that I am grateful for~Jay taking a leap of faith in himself and taking a chance to go out on his own, the fact we have grown closer, I am grateful that we are doing alright financially through this endevor. Last year we took a financial planning class to try to get out of debit~get rid of credit cards and put back for emergencies.I had not reached that financial Peaceful place when we went out on this leap of faith. But God has not let us fall flat on our face~we hace a few bandaides and some scrapes. But we are doing alright! I guess the purpose of this post is that this is one of my recent frustrations. For the next few days it is my goal to post the things that have gotten me to always say "I am fine!" If you do not know what fine means in my dictionary~Fu@@ed Up, Insane, Nuerotic, and Emotional! For the past few weeks I have been very very FINE!! But I have been my own shrink for years and if I don't get this crap out it will drive me nuts and take away from my normal charming disposition! If you know me I know you are laughing your behind off! Ok~it will make me feel better!

Sunday, April 20, 2008

I've Got to Go...

A man traveling by plane was in urgent need of a restroom facility, but each time he tried, all restrooms were occupied. The flight attendant, aware of his predicament, suggested he use the attendants "ladies room" but cautioned him "DO NOT PRESS ANY OF THE BUTTONS!". There next to the paper roll were four buttons marked respectively:
The man finished his business in the restroom facility but his curiosity got the best of him. He carefully pressed the WW button and immediately a gentle flush of Warm Water sprayed his bare bottom. We thought, "Wow, these gals really have it nice."
So, a little more boldly he presses the WA button. Body temperature Warm Air blew across his wet bottom and dried it comfortably.
"Aha," he thought,"No wonder these women take so long in the bathroom with these kind of services!"
So he pushed the next button, PP, with anticipation. A soft disposable Powder Puff swung below him and dusted his bottom lightly with talc. "Man, this is great,"he thought as he reached out for the ATR button.
When he awoke in the hospital, the morphine was just wearing off, so in confusion, he buzzed the nurse to find out where he was and what had happened. He explained that the last thing he remembered was intense pain in the ladies room on the plane.
The nurse explained,"Yes, you must have been having a great time until you pushed the Automatic Tampon Removal Button. By the way, your penis is in the trash can by the door."

Thursday, April 17, 2008

The New Priest

The new priest was so nervous at his first mass, he could hardly speak. Before his second appearance in the pulpit,he asked the Monsignor how he could relax. The Monsignor said, "Next Sunday it may help if you put some Vodka in the water pitcher. After a few sips, everything should go smoothly."
The next Sunday the new priest put the suggestion into practice and was able to talk up a storm. He felt great! However, upon his return to the rectory, he found a note from the Monsignor:
1. Next time, sip rather than gulp.
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4. We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T!"
5. The recommended grace before meals is not "Rub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the grub. Yeah God!"
6. Do not refer to our Saviour Jesus Christ and his apostles as "JC and the Boys".
7. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.
8. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are never referred to as "Big Daddy, Jr., and the Spook!"
9. It's always Virgin Mary , never Mary with a cherry.
10. Last, but not least, next Wednesday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St. Peter's, not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Worm Song

I was reading Suburbia's blog tonite about talking to a worm and I got tickled. It reminded me of a song we sang as kids. If you know it sing along!Nobody likes me, Everybody Hates meGuess I'll go eat wormsBig ones, Fat ones, Juicy ones and black ones,Guess I'll go eat worms,First ones greasy~went down easySecond one stuck in my throat.Third one rustedFourth one bustedFifth one tried to run~SQUISH!!!!Now the song is stuck in my head~I am beginning to think that teaching kindergarten in affecting my mental state! Have a Happy Day!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Inspiration from a Sparrow

Once upon a time there was a little sparrow, who hated to fly south for the winter. He dreaded the thought of leaving, his home so much, that he decided he would delay the journey until the last possible minute. After bidding a fond farewell to all his sparrow friends, he went back to his nest and stayed for an additional four weeks. Finally the weather turned so bitterly cold, that he could delay no longer. As the little sparrow took off and started to fly south, it began to rain. In a short time, ice began to form on his little wings. Almost dead from the cold and exhaustion, he fell to the earth near a barnyard. As he was breathing what he thought was surely his final breath, a horse walked out of the barn and proceeded to cover the little bird with fertilizer. At first the sparrow could think of nothing except that this was a terrible way to die. But the fertilizer started to sink into his feathers, it warmed him and life began to return to his body. He also found that he had enough room to breathe. Suddenly the little sparrow was so happy he started to sing. At that moment a large cat came into the barnyard and hearing the chirping of the little bird began digging into the pile of fertilizer. The cat uncovered the bird and ate him! This story contains three morals:
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
2. Not everyone who takes shit off of you is your friend.
3. When you are warm and comfortable, even if it is in a pile of shit, Keep your mouth shut!

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Fathers Can Learn alot from their Kids

The past few weeks I have been very extremely stressed! So to help me not eat the house down I have soul searched funny tidbits to make me laugh~This one is long but all mothers will appreciate the humor.
A San Diego father identifies 35 truths he learned from his children:
1. There is no such thing as childproofing your house.
2. If you spray hairspray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 4 year old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman cape.
5. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 room.
6. Baseballs make marks on a ceiling.
7. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw a ball up several times before you get a hit.
8. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
9. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
10. The glass in a window (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
11. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh-oh", it is already too late.
12. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke~lots of it.
13. A 6 year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 60 year old man says it can only be done in the movies.
14. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
15. If you use a waterbed as a home plate while wearing baseball shoes, it does not leak. It explodes!
16. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2,000 square foot house almost 4 inches deep.
17. Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4 year old.
18. Duplos will not.
19. Play doh and microwave ovens should never be used in the same sentence.
20. Super Glue is forever.
21. MacGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
22. So can Tarzan.
23. No matter how much jello you put in the pool, you still can't walk on water.
24. Pool filters do not like jello.
25. VCRS do not eject PB&J sandwiches, even though TV commercials show they do.
26. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
27. Marbles in the gas tank make lots of noise when driving.
28. You probably don't want to know what that odor is.
29. Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
30. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
31. The fire department in San Diego has at least a 5 minute response.
32. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make an earthworm dizzy.
33. It will, however, make a cat dizzy.
34. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
35. A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life(unfortunately, most in retrospect).

I have always thought that laughter is the best medicine! So laugh often even if you have to laugh at yourself! Hope you have a great week!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

You May Have Been Teaching too Long If?

Well it is the time of year that if you teach you grin and bear it! We only have 25 more school days left!!! Yeah! So I found an old funny that I thought I would share!
10 Ways to know if you have been teaching too long?
1. You think Caffeine should be available to staff in IV form.
2. You believe no one should be allowed to reproduce without having taught primary school for at least 5 years.
3. You encourage a parent to check into home schooling.
4. You believe in the aerial spraying of Prozac.
5. When out in public you feel the urage to snap your fingers at a child.
6. You believethat "shallow gene pool" should have its own box on the report card.
7. You can tell if it's a full moon without ever looking outside.
8. You believe chocolate is a food group.
9. You believe the staff room should be equipped with a valium salt lick.
10. You can't have children because there isn't any name that won't elevate your blood pressure.

I hope you have a wonderful day!

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Serenity Prayer

I love the Serenity Prayer for so many many reasons. It really is so simple to remember and easy to memorize. But the message it brings is so powerful. Well if you do not know it~here it is.

Lord Grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference.
So many times in life the difference is in the knowing what you can and can not change. Well being a teacher at this time of year I have been given a serenity prayer with a twist. Please know this is written in fun and not to offend in any way.

A Prayer for the Stressed!
Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I can not change,
the courage to change the things I cannot accept,
and the wisdom to hide the dead bodies of those people I had to kill because they pissed me off today.
And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today
as they may be connected to the butt
that I may have to kiss tomorrow!!

I hope your day is not going quite that bad~but if you have had one of those days I hope this bought you a little smile. Have a great day! And remember if you aren't into exercise it takes more muscles to frown than to smile!!

Monday, April 7, 2008


I was looking for some words of encouragement for a coworker that has lost both her Mom ans Dad within the last 6 months. I came across this poem that spoke to me and I hope it will speak to you.

I wish for you...
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Gentle hugs when you doubt,
Faith so that you can believe,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
And love to complete your life.

I asked the Lord to bless you
As I prayed for you today!

To guide you and protest you
As you go along your way....
His love is always with you
His promises are true,
You know He will see us through.
So when the road you're traveling on
Seems difficult at best..
God will do the rest.

(borrowed Author unknown)

May today find you well and if you are not well may you turn it over to God and let Him guide you through it. Have a great today and a Fantabulous Tomorrow!

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Enjoy the Ride

Life is like a ride in the country with the windows rolled down. You don't know what you will see or what adventures you will embark upon ~you just enjoy the ride! NO everything that you meet in life is fun or enjoyable. But do you like all of the sights and smells along the country ride. I don't think so~Skunk smells and cow poop! I think those are the times in our life where we hit that bump in the road or that large hole in a bridge. We have to regroup and continue to trudge ahead! Just like the skunk smell that lingers for what seems like miles sometimes are rough patches seem to never end. It is hard to smile and pretend everything is wonderful or even just ok. That is why we have friends! They are the air freshener in the car. They are not always in the view but the scent of them is always around to lend a hand, shoulder, or ear. Now everything on your journey isn't a bump~so many times things are smooth sailing! You just have to hold on, know that God will always ensure that you have enough Gas to make it through the trip. Besides whether your journey is smooth or bumpy, God has something in the journey to help strengthen us and help us grow. There is nothing better than rolling the windows down, cranking the music up and traveling in the country with the wind blowing in your hair. It doesn't get any better than that! So when life throws a curve at you~just sit back, crank the music up, and enjoy the ride.