This is a corner of my world where the hokey pokey really is what it's all about! So when life hits you all at once ~ just sit back and enjoy the ride!

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Fathers Can Learn alot from their Kids

The past few weeks I have been very extremely stressed! So to help me not eat the house down I have soul searched funny tidbits to make me laugh~This one is long but all mothers will appreciate the humor.
A San Diego father identifies 35 truths he learned from his children:
1. There is no such thing as childproofing your house.
2. If you spray hairspray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 4 year old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman cape.
5. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 room.
6. Baseballs make marks on a ceiling.
7. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw a ball up several times before you get a hit.
8. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
9. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
10. The glass in a window (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
11. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh-oh", it is already too late.
12. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke~lots of it.
13. A 6 year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 60 year old man says it can only be done in the movies.
14. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
15. If you use a waterbed as a home plate while wearing baseball shoes, it does not leak. It explodes!
16. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2,000 square foot house almost 4 inches deep.
17. Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4 year old.
18. Duplos will not.
19. Play doh and microwave ovens should never be used in the same sentence.
20. Super Glue is forever.
21. MacGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
22. So can Tarzan.
23. No matter how much jello you put in the pool, you still can't walk on water.
24. Pool filters do not like jello.
25. VCRS do not eject PB&J sandwiches, even though TV commercials show they do.
26. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
27. Marbles in the gas tank make lots of noise when driving.
28. You probably don't want to know what that odor is.
29. Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
30. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
31. The fire department in San Diego has at least a 5 minute response.
32. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make an earthworm dizzy.
33. It will, however, make a cat dizzy.
34. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
35. A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life(unfortunately, most in retrospect).

I have always thought that laughter is the best medicine! So laugh often even if you have to laugh at yourself! Hope you have a great week!


dot said...

Those sure made me laugh. Thanks!

Andrea said...

Thnaks for the laugh. I needed it.

Suburbia said...

Great list. I could see it all!